Top 10 Movie Dads June 21, 2009 4 Comments
Did you know that the biggest day for phone calls is Mother’s Day? If you didn’t, that’s probably not a very surprising statistic. But did you know that the biggest day for COLLECT phone calls is Father’s Day? That’s fairly shocking to me; what losers collect call their Dads to wish them a happy Father’s Day???? There’s no excuse! Dads deserve way more. So, if you’ve been less than thoughtful in the past, this Father’s Day – be nice to your Pops; get him a card and a gift, take him out somewhere and make a fuss of him, just like you would for your Mum. He probably won’t make as big a deal out of it as she does but it’ll matter to him just as much. On Sunday, give him more than the Big Piece of Chicken…(”Sure is easy to read with all this light!”) In random order…
Gil Buckman – Parenthood – It takes a big man to fill Cowboy Dan’s boots. Luckily, Gil Buckman is a big man. Puked on, dumpster-diving for lost retainers, having a crap time at work, staying sane through the 136th verse of the ‘Diarrhea Song’ , he still makes time to coach little league and play ‘Bad Dudes’. Even Gil’s own emotionally-removed Dad has to admit he’s a good Father and while he makes mistakes, “You made me play second base!!!!”, he manages to keep his sense of humour throughout. My personal favourite Movie Dad.
Top 10 Character Actors June 13, 2009 7 Comments
These are the workhorses of the acting industry – the actors who work almost everyday of their lives. As an actor making a great living – this is where you want to be. You work constantly, rarely get bothered in your daily life by strangers when you walk to the shops and if the movie/TV show/play tanks, nobody blames you. Usually, these guys have many other strings to their bow – some are also stunt men, writers, directors, musicians but all possess a chameleon-like quality, making them utterly invaluable. They can hop from stage to film to television to adverts to voice work and it’s never frowned upon. Sure, you’re ‘That Guy From That Thing!’ to most people but quite a few on this list have cult followings, which is always WAY cooler than being common or garden famous. Your fans will seek you out in whatever your latest project is, and, in reality, your more well-known colleagues are normally jealous of your freedom. Also, if you have a opportunity to play a really juicy part, there’s every chance you’ll get nominated and since you’ve probably worked with everybody, you’ll have loads of mates that’ll vote for ya. This is why the ‘Supporting Actor’ Oscar so frequently goes to ‘That Guy From That Thing!’. You go with your practically-anonymous selves!
Clint Howard -A child actor, he started before younger brother Ron and then watched Ron zoom into roles like ‘Opie’ and ‘Richie Cunningham’ that brought Ron much fame. However, the Howard Family must be the nicest, most stable and loving family in the world because there’s no jealousy or bad vibes – only public displays of support and strong familial bonds. Now that Ron’s a big-time director, he puts Clint in practically every movie he does. Not that Clint needs the work, he’s a favourite of so many other directors but because they actually like and respect each other. When MTV began their Movie Awards show, the first recipient of the ‘Lifetime Achievement Award’ went to Godzilla. The 2nd went to Chewbacca. Clint collected the 3rd and the entire Howard clan, parents and kids and all, showed up in formal wear to cheer him on. Clint took his award so much to heart that MTV quit giving it out. Clint couldn’t be topped.
(Rock on, Clint!!! I’m not putting this here as a joke, I really, really like this. Hey, if Warners wants to go with an older ‘Joker’ sometime, I have my hand up for Clint in a ‘Yea’ sort of way.)
Jon Minus Kate = ???????? May 20, 2009 5 Comments
(That’s eight question marks for those that don’t wanna think about it)
What’s with these reality shows about people who have a million kids? Are viewers interested in the spectacle of watching a large family cope? Or is it that we, as a society, are so sadistic that we enjoy seeing people lose their damn minds because they have too many kids? Most likely, it’s because we collectively miss something from our pop-culture past that isn’t around anymore – The Freak Show.
Since it’s not the done thing these days to point and laugh and stare in public at bearded ladies or enormously fat people or midgets for our amusement, shows like Jon and Kate Plus 8, Table For Twelve and the all-dancing, all-chaotic, all-Octomom ‘Nadya Suleman Review’ that goes on in the media have taken the place of the Olde Tyme Freak Show. It’s so that we can sit back and laugh and judge in the privacy of our very own home. And nobody will judge us for judging.
Top 10 Movie Mothers May 8, 2009 6 Comments
Instead of an introduction like I normally do, I’m going to give Paul and Storm the honours. Take it away, boys -
Peg Boggs – Edward Scissorhands – This lovely, adorable suburban Mum/Avon Lady is frightened at first when she happens upon Edward but her terror at his appearance quickly turns to concern, then the maternal care kicks in. She’s the one who really takes the time and effort to get to know Edward and is rewarded with unconditional faithfulness from him in return. I never completely bought the love story between Kim and Edward but the bond between him and Peg seemed to sprout faster then the woman could grow her hair for him to cut. I mean, by the end of the movie, she’s practically bald.
Top 10 Honest Love Songs May 6, 2009 No Comments
Some tunes have been overlooked in the ‘Love Song Department’, maybe because they weren’t sung by Richard Marx or Mariah Carey. Here’s 10 I’d prefer to be played over the 100 millionth spinning of ‘Everything I Do’ - which would result in a murder/suicide. And I really don’t want to have to do that.
‘Closer’ – Nine Inch Nails – Fair enough, you may not want to play this at your wedding reception with Grandma in attendance but there’s not much point in being with someone if they don’t feel this way about you and you about them; along with all the other, more poetic stuff. Holding hands and sonnets are lovely but that don’t get the babies made or keep the condom manufacturers in business. It’s stupid to ignore the basic human need to get nasty. Isn’t this the end result of everyone putting up with each other? (Quick question – why is America’s No.1 brand of condoms named after the guys who let the Greeks INTO their impenetrable city? “Ooooh, look! A great big horsey! Let’s haul ‘er in here!” Doesn’t inspire much confidence, I would have thought. This is why I’m a ‘Durex’ girl.)
‘(Home) This Must Be The Place’ – Talking Heads – Home is where the heart is so, if your heart is with your honey and your honey is with you, then you’re lucky. Then home can be anywhere. Awwww…I’m going to make myself puke. (No. I’m caught, good and proper – a closet romantic.)
Top 10 TV Sidekicks April 30, 2009 8 Comments
The Sidekick – Our heroes and villians would be nothing without them. Sometimes, they’re the ones we really tune in for; to see what they’ll get up to, cos they can often be more fun. Here are ten that have seared themselves into the collective pop-culture conciousness:
Baldrick – Blackadder – As Blackadder grew smarter with every incarnation, Baldrick got thicker. But Baldrick had his moments – he thought if he wrote his own name on a bullet during wartime that he wouldn’t get shot, cos he’d have the bullet with his name on it. Makes sense, really. So he threw the first dictionary in a fire; who can say they wouldn’t have done the same, given the situation? And, fair enough, he rumbled Blackadder’s plan to marry the cuckoo Queen Elizabeth. Perhaps he meant well? Say what you’d like about his stupidity but I’d bet money that ‘Baldrick’s’ grand-daughter ain’t sleeping with Russell Brand.
DJ ‘Jazzy’ Jeff – The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air – A testament to never leaving behind the folks that made you what you are, Will Smith brought Jazz, part and parcel, onto his network show. And in return, Jazz made it funnier, more heartfelt and funky. In love with Hilary, constantly being thrown out by Mr. Banks but always ‘workin’ it’ in his Cross Colours gear, Jazz was the ‘Philly Element’ in the Prince’s new ‘Bel-Air Lifestyle’. Doncha forget, home-fry.
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