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‘Top 10’ Archive

Top 10 Irish Films March 10, 2009 No Comments

St. Patrick’s Day (And, if you choose to abbreviate it; it’s NOT ‘Patty’s Day’- it’s ‘Paddy’s Day’. Patrick is a dude’s name, dummy.)  A day where everyone is Irish, mostly for the beer. That’s some impressive PR job, Mr. Whoever-Popularized-This-Day.  Just think…St. Patrick’s Day is celebrated by the entire world. Japan and China may take over the planet with technology, the USA with McDonald’s and pop-culture, and India, just with their huge population alone but it takes a culture that stumped even Sigmund Freud (He famously said the Irish were the only people who could not be psychoanalyzed) to convince the whole planet, pretty much, to take part in their national holiday and to my knowledge, Ireland is the only country that can boast that claim to fame. Go othe_commitmentsn, ya good thing! *Now we’re sucking diesel! Here are some film suggestions for in between the ‘top of the morning’ toasts and the vomiting of green beer –

  • *To Suck Diesel – Irish slang; descriptive verb – in which one party is pleased with the performance of another party, where the advantage and/or benefit is accessible for many. EG, “did you see O’Neill score that goal? Now we’re sucking diesel!” (Has little or nothing to do with the ingestion of petroleum by-products.)

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Top 10 Music Videos by Film Makers February 23, 2009 No Comments

Music video has been a pop culture mainstay since some young guy at Viacom thought launching a 24-hour video channel was a topjonze idea. They’ve evolved into mini-movies, musician’s diaries, confessionals and introduced the world to some of the most creative people making films today. Some might say the the genre has gotten stale – (Yes, Mr. Rapper, I see you have your bitches and hos, along with your souped-up Caddy and that yer trousers don’t fit and you’re acting very naughty in a nightclub. Now do a vid without those things – at a petting zoo or driving a bookmobile or something) – but there will always be someone waiting in the wings with fresh ideas (I want to do a Beastie Boys vid-as-Western, myself) Here’s a list of ones I think make the obvious statement that greater things were going to happen to these people (most of them anyway). Please to enjoy:

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Top 10 Movie & TV Boyfriends February 19, 2009 No Comments

After a fun conversation with my buddy Sam, here’s my list of Movie and TV Boyfriends that I have loved (So it’s technically a Top 20; I have too many boyfriends to squash them into one list). It’s at random, boys, so don’t fight. I love you all equally!

MOVIES:

1.Han Solo – ‘Star Wars Trilogy’ – It was a tough choice between Han and Indy but since ‘Star Wars’ was my first introduction to the male phenomenon that is Harrison Ford, I’ll go Solo (Haha! My, aren’t we having fun already?) There’s a difference between a ‘Bad Boy’ and a ‘Rascal’ and Solo is the latter. A rascal that I used to dream would call ME ‘Your Worship’ and ‘Your Highness’ in a deliciously sarcastic way. He helps defend the rebellion, keeps that hunk of junk in the sky and always has time for a good old flirt. Like so–
Han Solo: You like me because I’m a scoundrel. There aren’t enough scoundrels in your life.
Princess Leia: I happen to like nice men.
Han Solo: I’m a nice man.
Princess Leia: No, you’re not.

Cue big smooch and a jealous sigh from me.

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Top 10 Oscar Moments No Comments

(I wrote a few of these while in the throes of being a Vick’s Vapo-Rub Vixen so I’m posting this now before ‘Oscar Fever’ becomes a plague and everyone’s sick of it)oscar_statue1

I have a love/hate relationship with most award shows but none so much as the Oscars. It’s an arbitrary thing to reward one performance and not another, it’s not like each actor or actress did the same role so there could be a sense of symmetry. Then people talk about ‘snubs’ and ‘disses’ which makes me a little sick, because in my opinion, these people are blessed just to be able to make films. To me, they’re lucky already. It’s also hard to take it seriously when you think about the fact that people like Alfred Hitchcock, Marilyn Monroe, John Wayne and Stanley Kubrick, among many other huge talents, never received one. I guess it’s like watching a beauty pageant – all the contestants are beautiful in some way but which one carried themselves off the best and campaigned the most convincingly? Still, it’s enjoyable to have friends over, do a pool, make your choices and hope to God somebody does a fun or outrageous stunt or wears a bin-bag so it livens up all the nepotism. And sometimes, your ‘guy’ gets their award, an underdog triumphs and someone says something cool. And ya don’t want to be the pleb that missed it. Here’s my picks from the past:

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Best ‘Muppet Show’ Appearances February 9, 2009 No Comments

Why anyone would really want to be famous these days is beyond me. I get wanting to be rich but famous? Besides the lack of privacy and not being able to go out without being followed and annoyed, more importantly there’s no more ‘Muppet Show’ to go on, so what’s the point? All Muppet Show stuff is pretty brilliant, here are 10 I really like.


Shirley Bassy Sings ‘Goldfinger’

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The – I Put The ‘Fun’ In ‘Funeral’ – Song List!! :-) February 1, 2009 No Comments

There’s this ‘25 Random Things About Me’ thing that’s going round. Despite much prodding, I’m not going to do that but I’m doing this instead, cos I’m a cranky cow.clownfuneral

Here are the songs I want played at my funeral.

I’m not suicidal or anything. Listen, your funeral is the last party you are ever going to throw and it’s the one where no-one lets you pick the tunes. Well fuck that; I want my own songs, not these hymns about Jesus and stuff. Hey Jesus, you had your chance; you died (rather spectacularly, I might add) and then rose again so if you didn’t like the songs, it’s yer own fault. I don’t want people wailing on about you at MY going away bash… Hang on, there’s a knock on the door…

Oh, hi Jesus! How’s it going, man?…. OK, we’ll talk but when I get up there we’re going to have words about the track selection…… No, I don’t want to make a big deal out of it…… Uh, you can’t come in right now, I’m busy….. No, no, just go away! No, I do not want to feel your stigmata wounds….. Jesus, Jesus! Piss off!!!!!
(Anyway, in case I die – hopefully when I’m around 78, in the arms of a 26-year-old man due to a gunshot wound to the head inflicted by his 22-year-old girlfriend who catches us – please make sure these are the songs that are played. Thank you. I am in the sane-est mind I’ll ever be, signed – Erin Feeney. *Witnessed by Matthew Schoenfeld*)

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